u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Farmville is her only friend.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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