I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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