Well douche your snatch and let's go!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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