i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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