Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
