YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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