I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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