When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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