i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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