ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
he wants to bone in the snuggie
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
