dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
