Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
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