worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
