Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
