dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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