either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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