can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Did I show you my penis last night?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
