is your mom at the bar?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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