can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
