my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
