Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
