A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We are two peas in an std pod
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
