So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
