I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize