The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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