i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
