You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize