Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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