You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
im so drunk with asians
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties