ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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