just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
