His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
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I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
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I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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