I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
