I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
