i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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