i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
