Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
