What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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