you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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