its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He called his prostate his "boner button".
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize