she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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