I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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