so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
