Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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