my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize