Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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