that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize