What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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