Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
