I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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